It has been a common theme in the last few circling and DiD sessions of being called to something, or the yearning to feel the call to something, or the ability to hear the call and respond. It feels like there is something different between choosing to do something and feeling called to do something. Choosing to do the thing feels like a conscious action that is arrived at through rationality, and being called to something feels like it comes from something outside your conscience.
For whatever reason, it feels (at least to me) like being called to do something feels much stronger than choosing to do the thing. It taps into something deeper, something beyond conscience thought and choice. It feels more right. You don't think it's right. You feel it.
I am wondering if this feeling is congruence or alignment. Is it the feeling of rightness you get when the person you want to be is aligned with the action you are taking? And not because you think it will be the right thing, but because you feel like it is the right thing. If you think about it too much, it becomes instrumental or utilitarian but if you just feel like it is right and trust the feeling, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I also see a big danger here. If the person who you are is not aligned with who you want to be, then the feelings may lead you to a place that in retrospect you don’t agree with or regret. If you haven’t thought your way through careful retrospection to the person who you want to be then just trusting your feelings will lead you more down the path of the person you don’t want to be or if you are mistaken about the person who you are or aren’t being fully honest with yourself about the person you want to be.
To be called successfully I think you need to:
Know who you are with high accuracy.
Know who you would like to be.
Notice the opportunity to act in alignment with who you want to be.
Then take the action that moves you in that direction.
And when you can do all these things sub-consciously, is that the feeling of being called?
Let me know what you think.